craigslist can be a source of endless fun

If you are emailing to invite my “godless, heathen and doomed soul” to your church, ummmm, no.
If u cant b botherd 2 type the hole wrd or cant use the shft key i dont want u. lol.
If you call me bitch, hoe, girl, slut, tramp, bee-yotch, pussy, bimbo, barbie, chick, cunt, ho, twat, skank or hooch, I’m not interested.
If you are looking for a “marriage of convenience” to either get you into the country or to keep you here, keep lookin’.
If you’re offering a free breast exam, I think I’ll pass.
If you’re looking for someone to round out your threesome, it’s not me.
If you are seeking someone to spank you or change your adult diapers, just no.
If you are not old enough to buy a beer, I’m not interested, even if you CAN afford it.
If you are willing to pay me for ANYTHING, I don’t think so.

Just to clarify . . . . .