right at this moment i am sitting in the back of my sister and her husband’s corolla, on highway 41, thinking back on the past few days events. one thing that stands out is how proud i am of my mother. she did an amazing job putting a beautiful service together for my grandmother. she […]
shopping is fun!
tonight, josh and i went shopping for an outfit for me to wear to grandmom’s funeral. we hit macy’s, DSW, and parisian, and i ended up with a brown argyle sweater, with cream and orange diamonds and blue accents, a white shirt, a light blue tie, some sort of brown pants and some shoes by […]
at the red eye cafe, downtown indianapolis
one thing about going through hard stuff when you are depressed is you are never quite sure what’s “real” sadness and what’s just your body tricking your brain into feeling sad. i suppose i should just embrace that i’m sad right now, be okay with it, and remember that i won’t always feel this way. […]
digging out eyeballs
this was originally written and posted at youthontherock.com on digging out eyeballsthis particular passage has troubled people, who don’t understand the brilliance of jesus’ teachings, for many years: You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent […]
smells i love: my parents backyard
i came over to my parents place today, and am sitting on their back deck, enjoying wifi and the outdoors. i came over for a couple reasons. one: to get out of the house, as it is a lonely place to be right now, since my wife no longer lives there. two: to check on […]
desecration of our hearts
unlike most of the poems i post here, i didn’t write this one just now. instead, i am posting one i wrote on august 22, 1995, that i just found in a long-lost journal. it seemed fitting. desecration of our heartshas no one else noticed?did nobody mention?that death is not funnyand killing’s not entertainment? violence […]
thanks, you know who you are
you who have called to make sure i’m okay through all of this: thank you. i really appreciate getting the phone calls that just say sorry and ask how i’m doing. it makes me feel loved. when people treat each other with grace and encouragement, it is god showing himself faithful. good job guys — […]
starbucks at camby moved my cheese
Listening to: Funky Monks from the album “Blood Sugar Sex Magik” by Red Hot Chili Peppers so, everyone who’s anyone at the starbucks in camby, indiana knows that i have my own flipping chair here. it is the one i always sit in, without exception. i have come in, seen people in my chair and […]
neva wilson died today
my grandmother, my mother’s mother, neva wilson, passed away today at about 10:30 AM central time, approximately 1 hour ago. she had not been in good health for years, and the last three weeks have been very rough for her, with surgeries, infections, in and out of consciousness and finally succumbing to sleep, like the […]
Shma Y’sroel, Hashem Elokainu, Hashem Echad
You quench my thirsting soul and you fill my appetiteI give myself to you because you treat me rightPut my trust in the world and the world gets tightShift my trust to you it’s like a crystal clear nightExpand in all directions get the sections to uniteHashem’s rays fire blaze light my way light of […]
strattera and suicidal thoughts, the news gets is wrong
i just heard from andy. he called to let me know that he heard something on the news about that lilly had released some thing or other about strattera, and it causing suicidal thoughts, and wondered if i knew about it. naturally, being a careful chris, i know that strattera is an SSRI, and like […]
fear
Listening to: Aish Tamid from the album “Shake off the Dust…Arise” by Matisyahu ADD and depression often go together. then there is this thing called general anxiety disorder. i have ambivalent feelings about that particular phrase, let alone the condition it represents. perhaps i feel about it the way lots of people who piss me […]
people hitting on people
i love it when i’m at starbucks, like now, and i see a dood hitting on a chick. it’s even more fun the the guy has no chance, and she’s making that very clear, and he’s clueless. this chick looks positively bored, if not a little grossed out, and he’s all, “how often do you […]
sleeping: poorly
it was almost 4:40 before i was able to go to bed last night. i cheated on my wake-up time, too. 🙁 bad, chris, bad! Technorati Tags: blog, blogger, blogging, depression, imnsomnia